Thursday, 27 March 2014

How to Increase Trust in a Relationship

Before we begin, let me get one fact straight. The base of any relationship, old or new, is TRUST. If you don't have that ingredient, then your relationship is definitely incomplete. 

Now What does trust exactly mean? Some may define it as living with the same person day by day and believing that he will never leave you for anyone else. Another definition of trust is knowing that the person who you share your deepest secrets with, will never pass it on to another person no matter what.

Now ask yourself this. Who is the person closest to your heart right now? Your mom? Husband? Best friend? Then comes the hardest question. Do you trust that person so completely enough to hand over your heart and soul to them? If you said yes, then you are the few lucky ones. If not, well you definitely need some tweeking in order to feel more secure.

In today's world, trust comes hard. It has become easier for humans to lie their way through a situation rather than facing it with the truth. Morals have changed, ethics are ignored. But we still have to live our lives on this planet. A couple of strategies I came up with that we can pay attention to In order to bring some trust within our lives.

1. Trust yourself. Like Ralph Waldo says "Self-trust is the first secret of success". Once you start trusting your instincts, and your own actions, it will be much easier for an outsider  to trust you.

2. Be True. To the person close to you. As the saying goes, give with one hand and take with the other. Never lie. Never cheat. Even if you think it's best for that moment, it will come out sometime or the other. Nothing ever stays hidden anyways. The more truthful you are to that person, the more true that person will be to you.

3. Avoid secrets. The moment your husband or your friend realizes you are hiding something, that's the moment the trust level drops to a negative. Foremost, Never hide anything from your partner or friend. Be open and share even the deepest feelings. But there come rare times when some part of our lives is better left in the dark. Those parts should just be left to where it is, instead of emphasizing there secrecy or making it obvious that something's up.

4. Never judge. It's part of human nature to criticize everyone's flaws. Specially people close to us, they come under fire the most since we want to them to be perfect. But you have to realize it's bad habit and repels a person further away from you. It creates a fear of disappointing, which forces them to breach on your trust. 

5. Be reliable. Don't break your promises. Remember every word out of your mouth is another sentence on a contract. Let them know you can be relied on through any situation. Be predictable.

This morning I came across a lovely piece of writing about the essence of trust and love between our Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) and his first wife Hazrat Khadijah. 'Once Hazrat Aisha asked the Prophet if Khadijah was the only woman worthy of his love. The Prophet replied: "She believed in me when no one else did. She accepted Islam when people rejected me. And she helped and comforted me when there was no one else to lend me a helping hand."' We all know the story of when Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) got his first revelation and how it scared him so much that he ran home to his wife and covered into her for shelter. And Hazrat Khadijah trusted her husband enough to believe him, no matter how impossible it sounded, and to support him through it. Do you have that kind of trust level between yourself and the people close to you? You are the judge of that.

Till next time folks, have a lovely weekend! XO


  1. Good one, liked it.

    Keep it up.

  2. Lovely and indeed it takes years to build trust but only seconds to shatter it!